How to Support Someone in Recovery: A Guide for Therapists and Friends

Supporting someone in recovery from addiction can be challenging, yet incredibly rewarding. Whether you’re a therapist, family member, or friend, your role in the recovery journey is essential. Understanding the emotional, psychological, and physical challenges someone in recovery faces can help you offer the right kind of support. In this blog post, we’ll explore practical strategies for supporting someone in recovery, whether they’re working through a 12-step program like Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) or another type of addiction recovery process.

1. Practice Empathy, Not Sympathy

Empathy is one of the most important skills you can use when supporting someone in recovery. Rather than feeling pity for their struggles, try to understand their experience from their perspective. Active empathy allows you to relate to their challenges without judgment, offering emotional support that encourages healing and growth. It’s important to acknowledge their pain, but also recognize their strength and progress.

2. Be an Active Listener

Sometimes, the best thing you can do is listen. Active listening means giving your full attention, understanding, and responding thoughtfully to what someone says. This helps the person in recovery feel heard and validated. Avoid interrupting, offering unsolicited advice, or minimizing their struggles. Instead, focus on listening with the intention of supporting their emotional and mental needs.

3. Set Healthy Boundaries

It’s crucial to set and respect healthy boundaries when supporting someone in recovery. This includes being clear about what you can offer in terms of emotional and physical support, while also protecting your own well-being. It’s okay to acknowledge when you don’t have the answers, and it’s important to respect the limits of what you can handle. Boundaries help create a safe environment for both the person in recovery and yourself.

4. Encourage Accountability and Responsibility

Recovery is a process that requires the person to take ownership of their actions and decisions. Encourage accountability by being supportive without enabling harmful behavior. This might mean gently reminding them of commitments or offering positive reinforcement when they take responsibility for their actions. Empower them to make decisions and hold themselves accountable for their recovery journey.

5. Avoid Enabling

Enabling occurs when you unintentionally support the behaviors that contribute to someone’s addiction or relapse. This might include making excuses for them, covering up their mistakes, or tolerating harmful behavior. Instead, focus on encouraging healthy choices, setting limits, and providing the support needed to help them take responsibility for their actions. Enabling behaviors only prolong the recovery process and make it harder for the person to grow.

6. Educate Yourself About Addiction and Recovery

Understanding addiction and recovery is crucial when supporting someone in the process. Learn about the 12-step recovery process, the psychological and emotional challenges that come with addiction, and what people in recovery need to stay on track. The more informed you are, the better you can offer practical and compassionate support.

7. Celebrate Small Wins

Recovery is a long-term process, but it’s important to celebrate the small victories along the way. Recognize and acknowledge even the smallest progress, whether it’s a day of sobriety, a successful therapy session, or reaching a recovery milestone. Celebrating these wins can help the person in recovery stay motivated and feel encouraged to keep going.

8. Be Patient and Non-Judgmental

Recovery takes time, and there will likely be setbacks along the way. It’s important to be patient and non-judgmental throughout the process. Avoid expressing frustration or disappointment when they face difficulties or make mistakes. Instead, offer encouragement and reassurance that setbacks are a normal part of the journey. Your compassion and patience will help them stay focused on their long-term goals.

9. Encourage Continued Support and Therapy

While you can play an important role in their recovery, it’s essential that the person also seeks professional help and continued support. Encourage them to attend therapy, 12-step meetings, or other support groups that can provide the tools, guidance, and community necessary for long-term recovery. Support groups are an invaluable resource for individuals in recovery, offering the opportunity to connect with others who are facing similar challenges.

10. Take Care of Yourself

Supporting someone in recovery can be emotionally taxing, so it’s important to take care of your own mental and emotional well-being. Practice self-care, set boundaries, and seek support if needed. If you’re a therapist, make sure you’re seeking supervision or peer support to manage the emotional challenges that come with helping others through recovery.

Supporting someone in recovery is a delicate balance of offering compassion, understanding, and encouragement without enabling harmful behavior. By practicing empathy, listening actively, setting boundaries, and celebrating progress, you can make a meaningful difference in their recovery journey. As a therapist or friend, you don’t need all the answers—sometimes, just being there and offering your unwavering support is enough to help them through the tough times.